04 December 2010

An Apology, An Update, and A Commitment

First my apology to GOD.. I know you don't hate me.. but damn do you have to pour it on so hard.. I mean .. I am getting older and would rather that you not pick on me so much..

Next, an update on my DH (cliff notes.. ugh) but you can check here..  The Update Link

And lastly the commitment..
Alright, now you DID NOT think that because my world was turned upside down that I was not going to stick to my commitment.. if you did ... tsk tsk..

Now.. I will disclose that the fact that my stomach has been in a knot, and I have felt like I am on the verge of puking every other hour from my nerves, that this has not help curb my appetite.. but here is what I ate today:

1. 1 cup of coffee, fat free creamer 0 fat
2. protein shake  0 fat
3. two cups of tea
4. 1 bottle of water
5. A 1/2 cup of fat free chili (I know it was not a liquid, but it was very liquidy)
6. two teaspoons of fat free yogurt
7. 1/2 cup of Progresso Light chicken and rice soup 1.5g fat
8. cup of tea

Around 10:00 am I got the mother of all headaches.. I can only attribute it to a sugar drop/withdrawal.

Around 2:00, I felt very lethargic and just wanted to crawl up in  a ball.. it could also be an adrenaline drop from exhaustion.

So despite a world of chaos, I am going to still move forward.. I perhaps did not do straight liquids today, but believe me.. this is a far cry from what I did the weeks prior..
I do acknowledge that the protein levels were not there (please excuse this because it was a matter of eating something soft so I did not puke from my nerves) I think if I had a solid protein I would be having problems.. it will come ... just not today (or maybe even tomorrow).

So, I am now about to go up and take a hot shower, relax, and put on QVC.. That ditzy Lisa Robertson is on and I just love listen to people tell her that she looks like she needs to gain some weight.

Final thoughts.. you guys are the best.. when I read you comments I cried tears of comfort.. how can this be that people who have only met me through this blog or our Boobs event, can be so incredibly caring.. love you guys!


  1. You are amazing! With all you and your family are going through... you are still kickin' ass with your band. i am thinking of you daily and praying feverishly. *Maria*

  2. This is the thing when you're too busy to get to the computer - I missed whatever you are going through :( So sorry I haven't been here to wish things were better for you - but whatever is going on, with your fantastic attitude and just being the person you are full stop - you will have the fortitude to face it head on and prevail. xxx

  3. I have thought about you all day. You are a very remarkable woman and I am so lucky to know you. Stay strong!

  4. Oh Barb, you're doing amazingly. Really hope that Mark is much improved when you go back in and that you get some solid correct (really good) information.
    Am still rooting for you both.

  5. Continuing the prayers - you are stronger than I think I ever could be my friend... Hang in there!!!

  6. and we love you and Mark. Hang in there Barb and we will continue to pray for you guys.

  7. I have been thinking about you... and will continue sending you good vibes. Great job on the eating and not turning to my favorite semi liquid (ice cream).

  8. I am so sorry. {{{HUGS}}} for both of you.

  9. Still sending lots of prayers and love Barbara. I so wish you and Mark weren't battling this beast but am so glad to hear his numbers are so much better! Love you much! xoxo

  10. So glad to hear that your hubby is improving. My prayers are with you.

    I don't know how you can stay focused with all you have going on! All I need is heavy traffic on the way in to work to mess up my day. You're truly an inspiration.