30 April 2011

School Girl Giddy

So, I am learning about the balance of life.

My mind is in a good place.. I am hangin in the low 70's ..Not exactly where I want to be forever, but eh I am not worrying about it.

I am most excited about getting my new boobs.
I find myself looking in the mirror and yanking the old girls up .. as if to stick them on an elevator and yell "going UP".

Yes, I am not going to be shy  about this.. I am going D... I have forever in my life been a B student, and this girl is going all out.. I want some decent boobs.

And then there is the face.. the doc is going to do an eye brow lift.. it is a very interesting procedure.
There is a blue clip that is made out of sugar, that they insert above the brow, it gives a gentle lift to the brow, and as scar tissue develops around the clip it dissolves re adhering the brow line.. quite cutting edge .. the before and after pics are amazing.

Don't ask me why I am enamored about this whole PS concept.  Its not a self confident thing, because I am very secure in my identity.. maybe its just the concept of aging who knows..

I have not gone to any therapy.. but just feel like I want to do something to reinvent myself.
It is partly the need to set a different path for myself.

I often think about just picking up and moving to another place, starting a whole new life.
And then i reflect and think about how wonderful my life was and can still be..

Allot to think about.. and at times it gets me excited that there will be opportunities for me.
To reflect and renew.. and cherish..

Sorry if this is getting sappy, but so much to process ... still trying to figure out why I am a survivor..
and a true survivor perseveres ... and that's my plan. 


  1. How great for you!! That is so cool. I can't wait to see your pictures. When are you going to do it?

  2. Sounds to me like you are doing it for all the right reasons!
    Oh! by the way a little "elevator" action sounds good to me ;-)


  3. You go on with your beautiful self! Can't wait to see the results

  4. We need to get together... Email me what your schedule looks like these days. *M*

  5. You made me cry a little Barb. I am so happy for you and cant wait to see results too! When is surgery?

  6. Hey, I just read somewhere that you are coming to FL? Any chance of getting together while you are here?

  7. Amazing Barbara!!!! I think what you're doing is very therapeutic and I am so glad. Another word for the PS journey is HOPE. I'm glad that you're feeling it, and that it is ok for your life to move ahead and that you deserve to continue to live. Because, of course, you do, and as you continue to live your life: it will never take away the life you had with Mark. You're just building your future... xo

  8. I want to know more about the sugar clip thingy, is it very invasive? Also, you go on the big ta tas, can't wait to see them!!!

  9. I just love you. That is all.

  10. Sounds like you're getting to such a good place.