You know what... my old habits have not died.. I just can't cram as much junk food down my throat as I used to...
I have gained 5 lbs!!!.. and I know exactly why.. I am eating chocolate, ice cream, cheese, crab dip.. all stuff that I have stayed away from for quite some time.
And the reason is that I am crapping my pants and nervous about this surgery.. so what do I do..
I feel disappointed in myself.. I know we all go through stuff like this.. but I really thought maybe, just perhaps, I had the food demons beat.. but no..
I am an emotional eater.. that's it.. there are no other ways to explain this.
I have this huge calendar in my office and I am about to take it down because I have 25th May circled ... and every time I look at it my head spins..
The only people that know about my TT are YOU, MY BAND FRIENDS and K... that's it.. no one in my family..
I have all the confidence in the world in my surgeon, it's just hospitals that make me nervous.
I have seen too much and have picked up on bad practices ... so I will not have a "ME" or otherwise known as a Pain in the Ass, to make sure things are addressed. and poor K.. I have told him, that if I croak during surgery he has to tell my mom.. LOL.. um.. he said that alone was a reason for me to come out of this alive..LOL.. poor guy.
Oh well.. pass the chocolate!!