14 May 2012

I GOT A CONDITION!!!

Ok,

A bit of drama mama here.. so bare the warning..
Today was pre-op day.. first to the surgeon who took my pre-op pictures.
Apparently he did not appreciate my startlet pose with arms above my head like a pin up model.
Oh well..but he did chuckle when I told him I did not want to see those pictures for sale on the internet.

I then received my CT scan report (which was supposed to focus on the location of my band and port). The good news is that everything is in tact and all looks good, the not so good news.. I saw the word "DISEASE" in there twice.. WTF... something about granulomatous disease and degenerative disk disease, including vacuum disk phenomenon.. OK.. the words disease and phenomenon do not sound good.  I mean, the word phenomenon in and of itself sounds like something rare.. so my busy little fingers went to the world authority on medical advice.. no other then WEB MD.. so I plug away as anxious as can be to see what in the hell it is.. and what comes up..

ORECK vacuum advertisement.. WHAT!!!!

So.. its on to GOOGLE.. and here is the extremely definitive and clearly explanative definition.
. the appearance of a radiolucent stripe in an intervertebral disc, a manifestation of disc degeneration; a misnomer since there is gas present.


What??? gas present in my disc.. come on..  let's try again..

So I found this explanation on another GOOGLE search...

This is kind of like when you "crack" your knuckles... a bubble of nitrogen gas actually gets "sucked" out of the blood/tissue surrounding the knuckle into the joint. In this case it has happened in a spinal disk that is degenerating (wearing out)... It's fairly rare.

Lovely.. it's fairly rare... yeah that sounds like me..

Then my lovely report goes on to say my hips are wearing out... WTF..

In summary, I think what the report was trying to say is this... YOU ARE GETTING OLD!!!

Why didnt they just say that.. I would of just responded... OK!

7 comments:

  1. Lol...as long as your condition is not contagious, you should be ok!

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  2. Ha! I don't mean to laugh but this so totally sounds like something I would do if I saw those words on a report. I'm sure you'd make a hot pin up girl!

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  3. I am guessing this is a side effect of paying directly for your health care. They want to make sure you get something for your money. No mincing words in the NHS.

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  4. You got a condition, alright! It's called Supermegafabululitis! I keep hoping I'll catch it!

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  5. You're still a bombshell. A older, wiser bombshell.

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  6. Welcome to my world and my realization....but I soooo love who you are!


    XO

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  7. A body wears out when you live your life to the fullest. If you want to age gracefully, keep yourself wrapped up and stay in and watch TV... When I die, I wanna be sick, not well... old not young... worn not new and shiny. Live it up! You don't have an expiration date.

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